It’s funny how time passes by. I’ve been talking and thinking a lot about why. Also I’ve been reading some very insightful books. Most recently it’s Once A Warrior Always A Warrior by Charles W. Hodge. He is a retired Colonel that specializes in the field of Trauma and PTSD. I haven’t finished the book yet however, it has medical reasoning and words describing the descriptions I have given for how I see things and feel on the issue. It sinks a lot with the another book a read much earlier. Seems the Scars I described as the lasting mental wounds/memories that seem to most effect me could most likely be imbedded into a part of the brain that is the reactionary I will call it what some used to describe as the Lizard Brain, near the basal ganglia and limbic system of the brain. But like any simple description the White Coats decided it’s an “Oversimplified”way of describing the brain. Apparently this part covers balance, coordination, breathing, and simple survival responses. Which is funny to me because those same doctors who describe it as an oversimplification all know many of the treatments that have been successful for PTSD seem to focus on that region. Several treatments seem to attempt what I would describe as factory reset for that portion of the brain to reduce symptoms of extreme anxiety, hyper alertness and every other stress response that most affects people. But I’ll let the intellectuals debate the finer points.
However it seems to me if there is a portion of the brain that seemingly overrides everything like fight or flight and things like breathing, you know everything that in an emergency situation would keep alive. That might be a bad place for a traumatic memory to reside. It would seem to me if something caused a memory to entrench itself there like a deep scar, that may have a negative effect and be very hard to get rid of.
So an my attempt of not letting whatever portion of the brain some of my Scars may be buried in not become nasty little booby traps I am studying the past. This year which happens to be right at about 20th year since I returned home from Iraq, I have tried thinking about events, what part of the year they occurred and who it involved. It’s definitely not for the weak, it also digs up old things a lot of us Vets seem to want to burry, hide or never want to think about again. However I always want to remember the Men I served with who were Killed in Training and Killed in Action. Below is my working list of guys I’ve worked with who need to be remembered, it’s not yet 100% but I definitely can see the finish line in my research.
1st Force RECON – 7
SSgt Vincent A. Sabasteansk 1st Force RECON Dec 9, 1999
SSgt David E. Galloway 1st Force RECON Dec 9, 1999
SSgt Jeffery R. Starling 1st Force RECON Dec 9, 1999
HM1 Jay J. Asis 1st Force RECON Dec 9, 1999
Cpl Mark A. Baca 1st Force RECON Dec 9, 1999
GySgt James P. Paige, JR Crew Chief, HMM 166 Dec 9, 1999
SSgt William C. Dame EOD MSSG-15 Dec 9, 1999
1st BN 23rd Marines – 14
Cpl Eulice Justin McDaniel H&S Co July 17, 2004
Cpl Zachary E. Kolda Weapons Co Dec 01, 2004
LCpl Brian P. Parrello Small Craft Jan 01, 2005
Cpl Joseph E. Fite Weapons Co Jan 9, 2005
LCpl Matthew W. Holloway Charlie Co Jan 13, 2005
LCpl Juan R. Rodriguez Charlie Co Jan 13, 2005
Sgt Jesse W. Strong 4th CEB Jan 26, 2005
Cpl Jonathan Bowling 4th CEB Jan 26, 2005
LCpl Karl R. Linn 4th CEB Jan 26, 2005
Cpl Christopher L. Weaver 4th CEB Jan 26, 2005
LCpl Trevor D. Aston Weapons Co Feb 22, 2005
SSgt Jeremy Smith April 06, 2011
Seaman Benjamin “Doc” Rast April 06, 2011
Sgt Michael Thompson Sept 12, 2016
1st BN 3rd Marines – 50
LCpl Richard P. Slocum Weapons Co Oct 24, 04
LCpl Jeremy D. Bow Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
LCpl Travis A.. Fox Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
LCpl Michael P. Scarborough Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
Cpl Cristopher J. Lapka Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
LCpl John T Byrd II Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
Sgt Kelley L. Courtney Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
Pfc Andrew G. Riedel Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
Pfc John Lukac Bravo Co Oct 30, 04
PO3 Julian Woods Charlie Co Nov 10, 04
LCpl Aaron C. Pickering Charlie Co Nov 10, 04
SSgt Theodore S. Holder II. LAR Nov 11, 04
LCpl Brian A. Medina Bravo Co Nov 12, 04
LCpl David M. Branning Bravo Co Nov 12, 04
Sgt Rafael Peralta Alpha Co Nov 15, 04
LCpl Michael A. Downey CEB Nov 19, 04
Cpl Michael R. Cohen Alpha Co Nov 22,04
LCpl Kyle Burns LAR Nov 11, 04
LCpl Blake Magoay LAR Nov 29, 04
LCpl Jason Smith LAR Dec 31,04
LCpl. Jeffery S. Blanton Charlie Co Dec 12, 04
LCpl. Franklin A. Sweger Alpha Co Dec 16, 04
Cpl. Stephen P. Johnson Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl. Fred L. Maciel Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
SSgt. Brian D. Bland Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Sgt. Michael W. Finke Jr. Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
1St Lt. Travis J. Fuller Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl. Timothy M. Gibson Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl. Richard A. Gilbert Jr. Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl. Kyle J. Grimes Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl Nathaniel K. Moore Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Gael Saintvil Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl Nathan A. Schubert Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Michael L. Starr Jr. Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Jonathan E. Etterling Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Brian C. Hopper Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Saeed Jafarkhani-Torshizi Jr. Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl Sean P. Kelly Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCPl Allan Klein Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl James L. Moore Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Mourad Ragimov Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Rhonald D. Rairdan Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Hector Ramos Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCPl Darrell J. Schumann Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
1stLt Dustin M. Shumney Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl Matthew R. Smith Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
PO3 John D. House Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
Cpl Timothy A. Knight Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Joseph B. Spence Charlie Co Jan 26, 05
LCpl Sean P. Maher Grays Charlie Co Feb 2, 05
3rd BN 25th Marines – 48
Cpl Bryan J. Richardson 3rd BN 25th MAR March 25, 2005
LCpl Michael B. Lindemuth 3rd BN 25th MAR April 13, 2005
Cpl Joseph S. Tremblay 3rd BN 25th MAR April 27, 2005
Sgt Aaron N. Cepeda Sr. 3rd BN 25th MAR May 7, 2005
Sgt Michael A. Marzano 3rd BN 25th MAR May 7, 2005
LCpl Lance T. Graham 3rd BN 25th MAR May 7, 2005
PO3 Jeffrey L. Wiener 3rd BN 25th MAR May 7, 2005
Cpl Dustin A. Derga 3rd BN 25th MAR May 8, 2005
SSgt Anthony L. Goodwin 2nd Mar Reg 2Div May 9, 2005
SSgt Kendall H. Ivy 1st BN 25th MAR May 11, 2005
LCpl Nicholas B. Erdy 3rd BN 25th MAR May 11, 2005
LCpl Jonathan W. Grant 4th RECON BN May 11, 2005
LCpl Jourdan L. Grez 4th CEB May 11, 2005
LCpl Wesley G. Davids 3rd BN 25th MAR May 11, 2005
Pfc Christopher R. Dixon 3rd BN 25th MAR May 11, 2005
Sgt David N. Wimberg 3rd BN 25th MAR May 25, 2005
Maj Ricardo A. Crocker 3rd CAG May 26, 2005
Cpl Brad D. Squires 3rd BN 25th MAR June 9, 2005
LCpl Thomas O. Keeling 3rd BN 25th MAR June 9, 2005
LCpl Devon P. Seymour 3rd BN 25th MAR June 9, 2005
LCpl Daniel Chavez 1st Tanks June 9, 2005
SSgt Joseph P. Goodrich 3rd BN 25th MAR July 10, 2005
LCpl Ryan J. Kovacicek 3rd BN 25th MAR July 10, 2005
PO3 Travis Youngblood 3rd BN 25th MAR July 21, 2005
Cpl Andre L. Williams 3rd BN 25th MAR July 28, 2005
LCpl Christopher P. Lyons 3rd BN 25th MAR July 28, 2005
Cpl Jeffrey A. Boskovitch 3/25 Aug. 1, 2005
LCpl Roger D. Castleberry Jr. 3/25 Aug. 1, 2005
Sgt David J. Coullard 3/25 Aug. 1, 2005
LCpl Daniel N. Deyarmin Jr. 3/25 Aug. 1, 2005
Sgt Nathaniel S. Rock 3/25 Aug. 1, 2005
LCpl Brian P. Montgomery 3/25 Aug. 1, 2005
Sgt James R. Graham III 4th Tanks Aug. 1, 2005
LCpl Timothy M. Bell Jr. 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Eric Bernholtz 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Dustin V. Birch 4th Tanks Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Nicholas Bloem 4th RECON BN Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Michael J. Cifuentes 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Christopher J. Dyer 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Grant B. Fraser 3rd RECON BN Aug. 3, 2005
Sgt Bradley J. Harper 4th AAV Aug. 3, 2005
Sgt Justin F. Hoffman 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
Cpl David K. Kreuter 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Aaron H. Reed 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Edward A.Schroeder 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
Cpl David S. Stewart 4th AAV Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl Kevin G. Waruinge 4th AAV Aug. 3, 2005
LCpl William B. Wightman 3rd BN 25th MAR Aug. 3, 2005
Joy After Trauma 